Computer- and technology-related anagrams

A few of these are slightly geeky, but most should resonate with the typical computer user.

Web site theanna.org = Browse the Net again.

Blue screens of death
= The End, so be careful.
= See crash-befouled NT.
= Feeble code ran thus.
= Solace: the beer fund!
= No FreeBSD? A clue...
= Free clue: bad (honest).
= Fortune's "ache, bleed".
[And a triple-anagram]
= Hateful snob decrees ~ "Trash feeble OS, dunce!"

The Windows operating system =
With DOS, we print Gates's money.

Buying Apple Macintosh computers =
A crappy single-button mouse, chimp!

Some unplanned downtime = Me damned line's not up now!

Simple Mail Transfer Protocol
= 'RCPT TO...' personal memos fill air.
= Proficient trolls or lame spam.

Computer nerds
= Trend: more CPUs!
= 'Crude porn, mate!'

[A 2004 study indicated that 70% of people would willingly trade their computer password for a bar of chocolate.]
Note: a hacker stole my PC password =
Chocolate wrappers sat on my desk.

This refers to a live Demonstration of Microsoft voice recognition technology. The left-hand side is text from the demo.
"Dear aunt, let's set so double the killer delete select all." =
Attendees tell dealer: "Loser, tell the OS: 'Suck a bullet. Die.'"

A password sniffer ~ forwards 'safe' PINs.

Usenet flame wars = Use straw man. Flee.

Dating sites = AIDS testing!

Four-nineteen scams ~ assure confinement!
Nigerian scams = Man cries "Gains!"
(You can almost hear him from the other end of the email.)

public static void main(String[] args)
=

                    _
     Improving IT  |_| 
     BASIC-class   |_|
     Giant turd    |_|

[The anagrammed text is from the terms of service linked to from the page Verisign threw up when a user accessed an apparently unregistered domain. The anagram comments on this move, which involved adding wildcard records for the .com and .net top-level domains. The wrong-headed 'Sitefinder' scheme was withdrawn quickly after even bigger powers slapped Verisign for messing up the Internet's infrastructure a bit.]

Sole Remedy.
YOUR USE OF THE VERISIGN SERVICES IS AT YOUR OWN RISK. IF YOU ARE DISSATISFIED WITH ANY OF THE MATERIALS, RESULTS OR OTHER CONTENTS OF THE VERISIGN SERVICES OR WITH THESE TERMS AND CONDITIONS, OUR PRIVACY STATEMENT, OR OTHER POLICIES, YOUR SOLE REMEDY IS TO DISCONTINUE USE OF THE VERISIGN SERVICES OR OUR SITE.

=

Sirs, your rigorous terms of service are so, so good!

If there is the tiniest chance I should make URL entry typos when I visit sites or the domain's nameservers ever cease to function fully, I vow simply to resist ever using DNS - or, easier, 'your' Internet - yes?

Sorry, I can't decide which of those varieties of torture to use...

Idiots.

The Linux operating system =
Total hermits' sexy penguin.

Disillusioned souls ~ use idols: Linus idols.

[From the footer added to emails it uses...]
Opera's revolutionary e-mail client =
My poor, li'l ole Atari can never use it.

Or pick one of these instead:
= Opera? I'll use it on my Atari. Clever, no?
= Poor Atari-lover men yell, 'Can I use it?'

Lousy news server ~ runs very slow, see?

[headline]
New E-Mail Worm Targets Hole in Internet Explorer
= Theme: warning on loser/lamer teen exploit writer.
= A wager here: MS experiment, we let Norton roll in it.
= Hell, one Net malware writer's rooting experiment...
Or, for conspiracy theorists,
Norton 'heroes' experiment, write malware. Telling.

The Linux operating system
= Run my shit on it, expel Gates.
= Elite haXOrs emptying nuts.
= Gates expulsion? Try hitmen!
= Put extremely, astonishing.
= No sex, sleep, night, maturity... [A few more stereotypes]

Chat room
= Macho rot
= Charm too!

Internet chat rooms
= Men hit on tart, score.
= Morons act thirteen.

Simon Travaglia described his work as a New Zealand system operator as involving "sheer, mindnumbing boredom". To deal with his boredeom and frustration with his lusers (the "l" is silent), he penned a series of now-legendary stories about the 'Bastard Operator from Hell' (BOFH), a sysadmin who delights in torturing his lusers. For some system admins the BOFH is a source of wry laughter, but he is a role model for those with no qualms about telling people they can fix a failing floppy disk with nail polish remover, to "clean that brown stuff off the inside of the disk" or about leaving booby traps for killing a new pointy-haired boss.

The stories are at http://bofh.ntk.net/Bastard.html. The anagrams are here:

Simon Travaglia = Aim - vital organs!
= Salvo-aiming art
= Voila - grim Satan!
= A grim salvation
= A rival git moans.

[An anagram for your 404 page]
Not found =
No dot-fun

[Another triple-anagram]
A 'remove list':... real motive's... to serve mail.

'Remove list' = Overt slime!

[For a bit of the bizarre...]
Debian GNU/Linux is ~ Bin Laden's UNIX GUI.

[If you have been on USENET for any length of time, you'll have heard of the Usenet Central Administration - the authority to which posters are asked to appeal when other posters or the entire newsgroup won't admit to being wrong, wrong, wrong and deserving of punishment. I'm not sure that as many are aware of the group's full name, which I have decided to anagram here.]
...
Usenet Central Administration Bureau and Advocacy League
= Naive argue 'But I need an email/URL, a contact address, a county...'
= A cute idea but... A contact address/a URL in Guyana? No email? ...Never!

Anonymous remailer = Use 'Marilyn A. Monroe'.

Try the real[sic] ancient ~ Internet relay chat.

Internet relay chat: = Therein art latency.

[-- text/html, encoding 7bit, 10 lines --]
= Nonexistent. Bet: mild glitch.

USENET archive
= Teach universe.
~ cures the naive.
= Richest avenue.
= Chat is revenue! [Banner ads?]
= Achieve unrest! [Find an enemy's previous words, to perfect that flame]

Nokia: Connecting people = One ponce lining a pocket.

Abort, retry, ignore?
= Error - bitter agony!
= Angrier? Try reboot.

But enough of these old-fashioned DOS errors. Bring on 'new and improved' Microsoft offerings such as:
Microsoft Outlook Express = For some, root exploits suck.

Microsoft Exchange = Go fetch an exorcism!

Visit the semi-long anagrams page for an anagram in honour of the Google Groups interface and the frustration it so often creates among those who do try to use it sensibly, among others.

Back to anagrams index page

Go to Anna's main index page